Doubting Doubts Gives Us Faith

I just read a really, really, really good post called Faith and Doubt (and how they coexist) at Rethink.
You should go read it. Then you can read my thoughts on it.

It starts off with a great hook:

I’d bet that at some point every person has had some doubts about their faith. But despite the prevalence of doubt in our spiritual walks it’s rarely talked about or acknowledged. And when it is, often I hear doubt talked about negatively. You shouldn’t doubt. You can’t question that. You know what the Bible says is true. We downplay this pivotal piece of our faith journeys.

I can’t tell you how excited I was to read that first paragraph. It was so good to hear someone being honest about the onslaught of doubt that most serious, thinking Christians experience.

I’ve just been reading through Job as part of my yearly Bible plan, and this quote (from the abovementioned post) resonated so much inside my soul.

I screenshot parts of posts that I really like, and this was all just so good!

I left a really long comment/testimony on the post and then realized I should just turn it into a blog post, haha, so here goes:

I am a very analytical person, so I want to understand everything. This means that I put myself in the shoes (and the brains) of other people so that I understand their position. This can get me into trouble when I don’t have a good way to rebut their ideas. I also have a strong dislike of pursuing worthless ends and wasting time. Thus, I constantly analyze what I believe so that I know it’s the truth.

I went through an intense period of examining my faith about a year ago, coming up with what-if situations for Christianity like what if it’s actually a conspiracy, a fake, a lie that we’ve been indoctrinated into? It was really hard for me, despite having grown up having no doubts that God existed and that His Word was true. I struggled mightily for a long time, asking God to confirm His Truth to me in a way I couldn’t doubt.

It all culminated during a staff Bible study this past summer when the staff of Camp Gilead were reading through and praying Psalm 139. All the doubts I had pushed away or half-explained came pouring and pounding into my head, and I realized it was a make or break moment. Either I let the doubts destroy my faith by ignoring them (making me insecure in my faith), or I needed to follow the doubts to their logical end and destroy them once and for all.

I ended up crying a lot that night, but I didn’t shy away from the doubts. I followed them to their source and dared them to try their very best to destroy me.

They couldn’t.

Our God is so much greater than any of the doubts I could ever have, and no doubts make sense without the context of absolute Truth, so they automatically fail anyway.

I was set free that night from the overwhelming doubts that had plagued me for so long, and now I have a new unshakeable confidence in credulity of the Bible and in the God whom my faith rests in.
I still have to ward off the little doubts on occassion, but that comes with the territory of being right, I suppose, haha.

God is not scared of our doubts, so we shouldn’t be either. I listened to their sales pitch and then watched them self-destruct when confronted with Scripture, logic, and The Truth.

Recently, I stumbled onto a song that gave me the title of this post, Doubting Doubts by Citizens & Saints. I wanted to imbed it, but my YouTube app is acting up so you’re getting a link, haha. I absolutely love the musicality of this song, but also the authenticity of the lyrics, their raw vulnerability.

In another vein, our God is so great. I’ve been digging Joshua Aaron’s version (half in Hebrew, half in English) of How Great Is Our God.

Thanks for reading; I hope it encourages you as you work out your salvation with fear and trembling.

Deus est Bonus! (God is Good!)

-Sydney

14 Replies to “Doubting Doubts Gives Us Faith”

  1. Two of my favorite individual responses to Jesus in the Gospels involve people with some doubts (or at least limited understanding):

    The prayer of the distraught father who cries out “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24)

    Peter’s reply when Jesus has just said something offensive and a lot of people stopped following him and he asks the 12 disciples if they’re going to leave too – “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:68-69) – translation (at least to my mind): “We’re not going anywhere…our faith in you as the only source of life is stronger than the things we are currently unable to understand.”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Both of those are such incredibly relatable cries of faith purified by doubt; thank you so much for sharing them! It’s so good to have examples of believers such as they in the Bible. 🙂

      Like

  2. Awesome post…..glad to read that I’m not the only believer that wrestles with “doubt”. Thanks for sharing your own experience and as always, lifting my spirit 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I remember so clearly my make-or-break moment… I was at the lamplighter guild, sitting in on one of the first chapel services, when I became suddenly aware of the walls I had built against faith. I took an internal step away and thought, I have two options; I can either deny and continue pushing away what I know is true, or I can open my heart to God and let Him impact me not only this week, but for the rest of my life.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Truly, Christian culture of today often regards doubt as some feeling hostile to faith when, in fact, doubt is part of the spiritual journey. I think the ambivalent opinion on doubt stems from verses like James 1:6, which says that “the one who doubts is like a wave of the seam, blown and tossed by the wind” and the account of Thomas after Jesus’s resurrection (“Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe”).
    Doubt impels searching – what it is, why we believe it – and these questions, once addressed and answered, strength the foundations of faith. I wonder how one would interpret James 1:6 in that light?
    Thank you for the thought-provoking post!

    Liked by 2 people

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